


Up and Atavism

by rabidchild67



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Crack, Dialogue-Only, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-25
Updated: 2013-05-25
Packaged: 2017-12-12 21:48:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/816418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rabidchild67/pseuds/rabidchild67
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Um, there are these things in nature called <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mating_plug">mating plugs</a>? BLAME THE KINK MEME!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Up and Atavism

**Author's Note:**

> For [this most excellent prompt](http://trekkink.livejournal.com/896.html?thread=211584#t211584) on the Star Trek Kink Meme.

“Spock.”

“Gwuh?”

“What. The. Fuck?”

“Come again?”

“I’d like to, very soon, but what the hell is… is… what did you put in me? I can barely move!”

“This is most unfortunate. I was assured the hormone suppressors would counteract the effects of the mating plug.”

“The what of the what, now?”

“ _Sigh._ Vulcan males, as a means to prevent other active males from encroaching on their territory, long ago evolved the tendency to deposit a thick, gelatinous mucus into the bodies of their mates immediately following coitus to prevent competition in mating. It is an evolutionary throw-back, no longer necessary in our modern, enlightened society, but nevertheless it is an unfortunate fact of Vulcan biology."

“Gelatinous… mucus…”

“In modern times, Vulcan males, particularly those in relationships with non-Vulcans, are prescribed hormone suppressors that lessen or even prevent the secretion of the plug.”

“I feel like I’m constipated.”

“Vulcan females, and even human ones, are able to expel the plugs handily, owing to the presence of the lubricating secretions generally produced by their vaginas.”

“Go, girl power.”

“This would apparently not be the case in a human male.”

“Boy howdy. Is the stuff harmful?”

“It will begin to break down in due course. However, there is a substance present that is designed to suppress the mating drive in the female.”

“I am feeling a little woozy.”

“You should probably make yourself comfortable on the bed.”

“So tie-tie.”

“Indeed, sleep would be advisable, Jim. As you do, I will contact the Vulcan colony and request a consultation with a healer so that I might ascertain where my medication went awry in terms of its efficacy.”

“’kay. Zzzzz.”

“I cannot believe this has happened again, Surak-dammit.”

“Whuzzat?”

“Rest, Jim.”

“’kay. And Spock?”

“Hmm?”

“When you tell people you fucked me into a stupor, you'll leave out the gross ass-corking part, right?”

“Indubitably.” 

\----

Thank you for your time.


End file.
